


A Dark and Stormy Night

by JaneSkylark



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-02
Updated: 2018-10-02
Packaged: 2019-07-23 14:40:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16160939
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JaneSkylark/pseuds/JaneSkylark
Summary: HP: Hogwarts Era In which Sirius tries to finish a Halloween ghost story and the night ends with a buzz. One-shot.





	A Dark and Stormy Night

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Happy Halloween!

“It was a dark and stormy night…”

“Oh, give me a break,” James mumbled. He sat with his back to the couch and Lily rested against his chest whilst sitting between his legs. He reached around in front of her to grab popcorn from the bowl in her lap.

“Excuse me. It was a dark and stormy night…,” Sirius began again.

“Padfoot, no good ghost story starts that way,” Remus interrupted.

“This one does,” Sirius stated exasperatedly, “as I was saying it was a dark and stormy night.”

“You’re only adding that because it is a dark and stormy night here,” Remus added as he pointed towards the window.

“Yeah and that’s cheating because it’s October in England so every night is dark and stormy,” Peter argued.

“Scooch over,” Emmeline said as she kicked at Peter’s legs.

“No.”

“There’s enough room,” she replied.

“No, there isn’t. Sit on the floor.”

“The floor is cold,” she argued as she finally pushed Peter aside and sat herself down albeit a little squished between Peter and Remus on the couch.

Sirius sighed dramatically, “It was a dark and stormy night. The priest walked slowly up to the house. The wind…”

“Priest?” Peter asked skeptically.

“Priests aren’t very scary, Padfoot,” Remus interrupted again.

 “The priest isn’t supposed to be scary.”

“Maybe you should tell the one about the chainsaw,” James said as he wrapped his arms around Lily’s waist and she leaned back while feeding popcorn into his mouth. He munched on it happily and then placed a sloppy kiss on her cheek.

“No. I’m telling this _one,_ about a priest and,” Sirius replied before taking a lengthy pause where he bent his head forward and dropped his voice and added, “an exorcism,” Sirius finished as he sat in front of the fireplace. He waited for his friends to ooh and aww but Lily and James were working their way through the popcorn while Remus, Emmeline and Peter were fighting over pillows. He huffed and shook his head, “Why do I even bother?”

“Yeah, I want to hear about the chainsaw,” Lily answered. “You have to tell a really good story because it’s Halloween.” Lily squirmed and repositioned herself causing James to tighten his arms around her.

“Is the chainsaw magicked? Does it run by itself attacking people?” Peter asked as he pulled a pillow out of Emmeline’s grasp.

“No, no it’s not spelled and that’s not the story that I’m telling.”

“The chainsaw story is better and very scary. This one just doesn’t have the same flair to it,” Remus responded and James nodded along.

“This one is very scary, in fact it’s even scarier! And it has a lot of flair! Very scary flair!  If you ponces would just let me finish or even bloody start!”

“Bloody! Is there blood in this one or in the chainsaw one? I think we should hear a story with blood in it,” Emmeline suggested as she bent down and grabbed popcorn from Lily’s bowl.

“This one does have blood in it in fact and also vomit and a possessed little girl and it’s a true story!”

“Oooh a true story,” Emmeline repeated as she rolled her eyes, “really, didn’t you also say that about the prom queen one?”

“Are you calling me a liar!” Sirius exclaimed and then, “The prom queen one was a true story!”

“Right…” Remus agreed as he nodded sarcastically.

“Oh yeah the prom queen! Tell that one again!  That one has blood!” Peter exclaimed.

“No, I’m telling this one if everyone would just shut it!” Sirius yelled.

Sirius gave everyone a moment to still and settle in before he began again, “It was a dark and stormy night. The priest walked slowly up to the house. The wind picked up and he felt a chill deep in his bones. He had a very bad feeling about this house…”

\--

“What was that?”

James stopped kissing Lily’s neck for a moment and lifted his eyes to hers. “Lily, we’ve been dating for 7 months. I think you are well aware of what _that_ is.”

Lily laughed, “I know what _that_ is but no what was that sound?”

James stilled for a moment and waited but didn’t hear anything. “Nothing.” He shook his head and began to kiss her cheek again.

Lily shut her eyes enjoying the feeling and trailing her hands up his back while reaching under his sweater.

.

.

.

.

“What was that?”

“Lily.”

“No, really James. I think hear something.”

“You’re just a little paranoid because of Sirius’ stories.”

“No, I am not. I heard something.”

“Was it a chainsaw?”

“That’s not funny!” She exclaimed and smacked his shoulder. “James, listen for a moment.”

James stilled but again heard nothing. He sighed and began kissing her cheek working his way down to her neck.

“You aren’t listening if you’re kissing me,” she laughed.

“Yes, I am,” he mumbled between kisses, “I can multitask.”

.

.

.

.

“Sirius?”

James’ head popped up immediately. “Pardon?”

“Sirius?”

James looked at her questioningly before sighing. “You know, it would be stellar if my girlfriend wasn’t calling out my best mate’s name at this exact moment.”

Lily laughed, “Maybe Sirius is playing a joke on us.”

“Sirius was still telling stories when we left.”

“Ah right because you have quidditch in the morning.”

James smiled smugly and agreed, “Yeah, quidditch.” Both of them knowing that James use of quidditch was his code word for… _it’s time for me to run off with my girlfriend_.

James laughed and continued kissing her.

.

.

.

.

“Okay really James I heard something.”

“Lily.”

“Would you please check?”

James lifted his forehead from her shoulder. She was looking at him with a small smile on her face and fluttered her eyelashes at him. She rested her hand on his cheek while tapping her fingers across it to nudge him along.

“I won’t be able to continue if you don’t check,” she offered honestly and shrugged. “Or…”

“Or what?”

“Or it is late. Maybe we should head back to the common room.”

“No, no I’ll check.” James stood up quickly, muttering under his breath, _“padfoot…ring…bloody…neck”._ He tucked the blanket back around Lily as he did so. “I’ll check the room.  It’s probably a loose window or something.”

“Thank you. Don’t forget to check the corner over there either,” Lily replied as she pointed towards the darkest corner in the room of requirement. They had found themselves there after excusing themselves from Sirius’ tales of fear because James had “quidditch” in the morning. No one had bothered asking why then were they heading out the portrait instead of you know up to their rooms. She smiled at the thought.

“Of course,” James responded flatly.

James began by the fireplace in front of where they were laying down. “I’m putting another log on the fire. Let’s warm the room up a bit more shall we,” he spoke as he turned to face Lily and she nodded, smiling.

“It might be the fireplace. The wood crackles a lot, you know. Makes all sorts of rubbish noises.”

“It wasn’t the fireplace,” she responded as she watched him start to walk the perimeter of the room.

He moved along the far wall before coming to the door and checked the handle. “See the door is locked. No one is getting in and just in case…” he quickly added an additional locking charm on the door. “Perfect.”

“Good,” Lily added.

James proceeded around to the dark corner. “Lots of rubbish over here,” he said as he picked books and random objects. Readjusting things as he checked behind a table. “Nothing here either.”

He came to the wardrobe in the adjacent corner and rattled the handle. “Locked.”

“Check the windows,” Lily ordered while she still lay on the floor.

James moved around to the other side. Checking all of the windows along the wall. “Ah!”

“What?” Lily exclaimed as she propped herself up to get a better look.

“See I was right! Here we have it. The last window wasn’t latched all of the way.” He pulled it tight, latching it and then added a sticking charm. “Just a rusty old window that was a little loose. Nothing to be afraid of.”

He smiled back at her and puffed out his chest a bit as he came back around to the fireplace.

“And we’ll even add some additional candles,” James said as he rubbed his hands together and transfigured some books laying nearby to lighted candles. He picked up the last book and transfigured it into an additional blanket and positioned over Lily and himself as he laid back down beside her. “See? All is well.”

Lily lifted her hand to his cheek and ran her fingers through his hair as she kissed him and he sighed.

“Thank you for checking,” she said before continuing to kiss him.

.

.

.

.

_whirrrrzzzzzz_

“That’s a chainsaw!” James yelled as he pushed himself up.

“Ahh!” Lily startled.

James grabbed Lily’s hand as they both ran from the room, half dressed, half screaming and half scared to death. They failed to hear the laughing from the wardrobe in the back of the room. The door popped open and Sirius jumped out quickly then followed by Emmeline. Both of them doubled over laughing.

“That was an awful thing to do!” Emmeline exclaimed between laughs.

“I had to do something to get James out. I wasn’t about to listen to them snog anymore.”

“I wasn’t suggesting that but you shouldn’t have made the chainsaw noise. You could have just knocked something over.”

“Well that didn’t work the first time. It doesn’t matter now, they’re gone and it serves James right.”

“Why?”

“This is my spot to take a bird and he bloody well knows it!”

Emmeline came around in front of him grabbing his hand and leading him in front of the fireplace and the pile of blankets. “Alright, alright I get it. Blokes are territorial. So anyway…tell me the one about the girl skinny dipping in the ocean again.”


End file.
